Fallin' into nightmare...I hope it's over

Hm...what a strange month behind me...I can not remember any time period in my life with so many challenges, stressful situations, loses, brakedowns or whtvr u call it, and come on-few weeks ago I could die...I hope next month - march will be much, much better! : )
I don't know from what to start?
From my first "hospital experience", near death situation, canceled travel, losed friend, or the fact that I lose in race of accomplishment of one of my biggests dreams, thing that I wanted for so long and working on, for almost a year...
I don't know what was the actual reason for each one of my problems. I know only, that it was like jumping from one to another, and like that whole month...It is strange to feel like that, to live a whole month in a nightmare.
I used to be one of that persons that everyone hate, 'cause of my luck and 'cause of almost everything I do -I do it easily...Now, I am not sure about my fortunate character : )at all...
My self confidence is realy low last few weeks and I don't know what to do with it, because I was never lacking in it. Seriuos stuff to deal with, but I must start now, just to try to prevent another february 2007 in my life. First I should find out what are the reasons for this events and things that brought me to the situation I am in right now...
Hm,....it's not going to be easy... : )
I lost my star and I have to find it again... Hope I will...I will try my best to come back to life I always wanted, life that I'd lived just one month ago...I hope I didn't lose it 4ever...
or, maybe I need smth new?
hm...till I find out
Vexy